13 Dec

It starts with making calls that take days to get returned, if…..

And then when calls or texts are returned, it is at a convenience to them, their wants, their needs and desires, and then… nothing for weeks, even months until that call or text or email comes, usually a text asking to do something with them of their want, their needs and desire…..

The signs were there- promises of things that would be done, showing up on your door step at late hours ONE cup of whatever in hand, not two, one for them, one for you… ONE

There was dropping the blunt hint of wanting a specific pitch-in benefiting their life, their convenience, an inconvenience to the askee. The talk centers around their problems with their spouse, their teen, their out laws and bosses. And then there is that use of the ‘word’- the J word, the K word, the M word, the T word and the N word, non of which are used in your home or vocabulary.

Nothing is said. Women are women, timid to speak up, moreso when the offensive one is a Beztie to do things with, maybe, hopefully, for life, or almost as long, until one day, damn if it doesnt smack of Booty Call Of A Female Kind.

Women do make Booty Calls on friendships. Just like in dating men (or women), women do come in to a friend relationship making promises that dont get kept with intentions that came off great out of the chute but, over time, petered (or paul’d) out. It is dating without the sex. It still doesnt feel good to note they werent there because of you.

Know this. It isnt you. It is them. They dont have what it takes for going the long haul. When the proverbial sh*t hits the fan, they will leave you S.O.L., hangin out there on your own where you figure you are better to be, until the next potential Beztie comes along and you try again.

Booty Call Bezties chase when you pull back.

The once in a while text turns in to e-stalking. The “I dont think so” response to their texted suggestion turns into eight more texts each one a cell phone screen longer than the prior text.

Saying nothing doesnt work. Saying something isnt listened to. Late night texts after nine, their talking about their ex or other girlfriends or moms, kids and husbands, learning their week was filled with other women friends….

Don’t take it personal. It’s not you. It’s a Booty Call of a female kind. Women with testosterone. Count to ten, wait 8 weeks and keep on keeping on.633pca



27 Sep

Staying power, that is a reward for visions that stand the test of time well. The FRC Values Voter is a mainstay of the D.C. political tourism circuit. Like clockwork, every year, the Family Research Council’s annual convention of faith comes together in North West D.C. Next year will be different. No, not in Jerusalem as the prayer goes this time of year, the Jewish new year, but next year across the Potomac, at the Gaylord Hotel in Prince George county Maryland.

Tony Perkin’s F.R.C. annual Summit is a must stop at for presidential contenders in the years of campaigns racing up to the final vote in 2016. This year is no different. The ‘they’, the hopefuls came in crowded race- Donald Trump, Ted Cruz, Dr. Ben Carson, Governor Bobby Jindal. On their day, Friday, the presidential candidate day, they came, they talked and they hoped they conquered, before heading back out on their POTUS trail.

To the regular attendees, there is little that is different. That, the familiarity is what keeps these attendees coming back year after year. The F.R.C. is the faithfuls camp reunion where friends see old friends, meet new friends and catch up on shared friends that have left them.

The 2015 was elevated to an even higher level of patriotism with this years gala dinner honoring every day people who did extraordinary things, the real superstars who stood up for their convictions in faith, of faith- a clerk, a baker, a fireman along with others told their beliefs were no longer valid.

Kim Davis’ defenders were not the party she belonged to foreheads but men and women from across the aisle standing next to her as her moral fibers were being stripped. Kim Davis stood at the dinner, reborn, a republican. Davis was already a Christian. In a world that holds a different benchmark for Hollywood celebrity multiple marriages, Davis a hometown girl was vilified, publicly raked over the coals for her conviction to marry not live with the men outside of the sanctity of marriage.

Perkins provides a safe forum for people of faith to come together in. And leave from. The Duggars, past attendees at after F.R.C.s events were noticeably absent post the disclosures of son Josh. Not to worry. The unscripted reality that ruled television the past weeks was paralyzing as people witnessed employers flip on their employee, voted in by people who knew her faith.

Davis’ employers made her their sacrificial lamb.

The world watched newscast after newscast, streamed video after streamed video showing workplace violence Davis’ employer, the state did not protect her from- people verbally insulting her, verbally offending her. Davis watched as her employer became complicit in hate speech, against her, leaving her to fend for herself.

Until Conservatives crossed the political divide  and stood with Davis.

The voter Summit is showing its years, the A list of radio row were elsewhere. News competition being what it is, pope stalking was more attractive to mediathen men on mounts battling for their win at the White House. The stalwarts stay. Besides, times have changed. No one needs to be anywhere to be there anymore. Live streaming has become a death knoll to events. That said, the Grand Ballroom was packed.


Non profits were in the  exhibit area- faces of conservatism activism over the decades still present in the conversation of freedom and faith. The swag is candies and ‘pray pins drink sweat sleeves, an occasional books. The conversation is easy. The friends are there. Friends of all colors, ages, plus.

Don’t buy the news alleging the Conservative party is vanilla. Not at all. The FRC is proof positive the Conservative party is vanilla, chocolate, cherry, blueberry and cinnamon.

In the main hall, when the POTUS wannabes are gone, speeches are delivered by activists delivering messages of God, and politics. And dinners.

Attendees race to get speakers books signed. The big announcement of the day is, annually, the result of the Straw Poll, announcing its Presidential choice. And the winner live cast on Fox TV is, was, Ted Cruz, followed by Dr. Ben Carson and in 5th place, The Donald.


In a world driven by polls, interesting.

Authors Note: As long as I covered news in DC, a staple at protests and just plain driving up and down the street, have been the protesters with placards and truck sides  embellished with images of dismembered babies and fetal parts. And then, the videos were released. Those videos. Yup.

Point of sharing  is the annual presence of the sandwich truck outside of conservative events, that truck, with larger than man size life images of fetal baby parts, arranged so the head, hands and legs are where they should be almost. The body parts are separated. And across the street is a restaurant wondering what it did wrong to deserve this truck across from the restaurant’s lunchtime and dinner crowd, as people sat eating their salads and such. Just like in the videos that are bringing good people together across a political divide of horror asking, is this how far we have fallen as a culture, or, more correctly, lack of culture and couth, if baby parts can be sold from a menu……


1 Sep

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It is the classic lesson in customer service. Few know it. I do. I teach it when needed like last week. Simply, the customer is always right.

The retailer, Walmart, had a momentary lapse of forgetfulness of priorities. Four call backs later and asking for a supervisor, I began to teach the Nordstroms Model. Guess what, six days later, Walmart’s Automotive department got it. Love them.

They remembered the customer in service.

Don’t take it wrong. This is a compliment to Walmart’s team in Arlington. Long hours, longer days, customers that complain is more the norm than people are able to admit to anymore in a world of social media used to bully and blast. To not take a moment and thank the team for overcoming the downfall of technology that added to the remiss, would be unfortunate when it is as easy to commend team members who put the customer back in to service.

I learned the Nordstrom’s model back in the ‘90s. I had attended a Beverly Hills Chamber of Commerce meeting. A speaker from the food services industry told a story, the Nordstrom Customer Service story that went on to become a staple in Customer Service Industry bibles.

It goes this way.

A farmer walks in to a Nordstrom’s store, hefts a tire unto the counter and said, “I want my money back.” The sales clerk was taken aback by a tire on a Nordstrom’s counter in the dress department.

She politely explained to the farmer, “Sir, we sell dresses.”

The farmer answered, “I bought my tire here.”

The clerk tried again, “Sir, we sell clothes not cars.”

The farmer, repeated, a little louder “I bought my tire here,” then hitched his thumbs in to his belt loops.

The clerk, schooled in Nordstrom’s Customer Service model, begged a moment from the farmer, called over another clerk to hold her place, and the farmer company at the counter, then stepped in to the back to consult with her superior, said to her superior, “Sir, we don’t sell tires here, we sell dresses.”
Her superior said, “I know, but we are Nordstrom” as he walked her back to the customer where the farmer, and tire, were waiting.”

The clerk’s supervisor asked to see the farmer’s receipt, which the farmer produced that showed a tire store had been located at that same spot that later became the supervisor’s Nordstrom. The clerk’s supervisor counted out the exact change owed the farmer, took the tire with as the clerk’s supervisor returned to his office, tire in hand.

The farmer left pleased.

The clerk followed her supervisor to his office. Without the clerk saying anything, the clerk’s supervisor looked up and said, “In Nordstrom’s stores, the customer is always right.”

Walmart stood behind the warranty of a new tire that deflated under warranty. Technology’s overreach into customer-retailer relations created problems with accessing product in real time along with interfering with other steps in the relationship. A supervisor and team captain took it upon themselves to go the extra mile for a customer.

The upside is, Walmart came out ahead, two baby outfits, a golden book, a sports bra and sweat top and a wish that Walmart superstore was closer. Imagine, a store that has everything from apples to stuffed zebras with everything in between under the same roof.

OMG, my dream vacay is now camping out overnight at Walmart, glamping at the ultimate. Walmart has everything!!!! Food, clothes, snacks, clean bathrooms, bedding, mattresses, books, TV’s, radios, did I say books, crafting stuff, is this not heaven on retail earth?

As if it couldn’t get better with Nordstrom’s, it did. On a recent foray to Nordstrom’s lingerie department, albeit the annual sale time, I received a thank you note and card from my sales assistant. As scary as one could make getting a card from a sales clerk, let’s reframe it. In a world of impersonal emails flooding my Inbox, someone took the time to hand prepare, post and send a note saying ‘we see you, you exist for real.’ Amen. Business card included, too. Take a note, big box retailers.

Why, I don’t even have to pack, bring makeup or think twice about anything because I can do everything once in 24 hours without even repeating myself. Damn, I would forgo camera shyness to live this dream. Birthday is coming, Walmart. Call me. Call me, Sam. You got my digis.

Linda, Mike? You rocked the Nordstrom Customer service model. You made this customer feel like a queen for a few hours. Thank you. Grin, looking forward to 24 hours on your turf….. !


1 Sep

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The other day I met a man who shared he holds a top job in the Administration. He made it clear he doesn’t work for the Administration. He is a lifer. A long timer. In the real world, they are scoffed at as Federal employees.

Live in D.C. long enough it is wisely known that a snowball cannot be thrown without knocking over about 70K Federal employees. They are everywhere, migrating from around the country, even world, for the guarantee of the three S’- shower, sh*t and shave. Being a Federal employee is security. Being a Federal employee does not mean they are the brightest of the bright. More often than not, they are the complacent, unwilling to rock the boat enroute to pension.

They are just people, at work at 8 and leave at 5.

That is a problem.

This man volunteered out of the blue, he got a F.O.I.A., a Freedom of Information Act request for data on something or other. He had no clue what it was for. He signed the paper denying it.

My eyebrows rose. My question was direct, “why did the man file the F.O.I.A. and what did he tell you was his reason for filing it.”

Dunno “said the Chief of that Bureau as he nibbled on snacks.

“What did he say when you spoke to him” I asked.

“Dunno,” the Chief of the Bureau said, “Never asked.”

I was incredulous. In social circles, the best one can curvaceously explode with is “O.M.G. you didn’t pick up the phone to hear him out, to find out who he is and what can be done?”

“No” he said “he probably wants money or fame, all Whistleblowers do.”

And there you have it why people turn up at workplaces with guns, often. No one took the time to take the person out of the building for coffee to sit down and ask “hello, how are you and who are you?”

A few years back I was at the Social Safeway in Georgetown. Yes, D.C. names our Safeways, – the Soviet Safeway, it’s shelves were almost always bare; the Secret Safeway, it was hard to find it and the Social Safeway where people went to hook up, so I heard.

Starbucks operated a concession inside the Safeway. Safeway employees ran the coffee stand. It wasn’t rocket science work. All it took was asking “may I take your order please” followed with a “how are you paying” then wishing a good day.

One man could not manage that. He was curt, flippant and so weird that customers complained. I come from the Smiles Can Win culture. My smiles were not winning. It got to the point that I spoke to the manager, cautiously. I didn’t want the man to lose his job. My professional opinion was the man was qualified for a job, not this one. This one needed Social Skills..

To my horror the Store Manager opened a drawer exposing papers upon papers of complaints about this man. My eyebrows rose, I asked, “What did he say when you spoke with him?”

The manager answered, “I haven’t spoken with him. I am getting ready to fire him.”

A mentor taught me to ask people if they are open to a thought. Their answering “yes” engages them in ownership of the answer. The Store Manager said “yes.”

I shared, “Have you considered taking him outside of the store, across the street for coffee, chat with him, get to know abit about him, hear him listen…”

The Store Manager said, “I never thought about that.”

The world now knows the shooter of the TV crew lived a hidden life. The murder of these two people began with H.R., Human Resources. Someone did not ask pertinent questions that may have saved the life of these two kids maybe not of two others.

The red flag was there with the man using a name, Bryce Williams, that is nowhere as near impressive as his real name, being a Third, part of a lineage. Thirds and Seconds don’t always see their ‘tack ons’ as impressive. To them being a Second or a Third is an anchor they don’t want to talk about, a liability of having to answer who number One is and whether they lived up to Number One’s accomplishments or could escape his failures.

Congressman Chris Van Hollen was threatened when it came out in his 2010 re-run for office that he is a Second. His constituents never knew.

Van Hollen The First was a giant among men. The world will learn more about shooter “Bryce Williams” over time, more than his being an aging hot rent-boy going for $2000 a night, a success in that field. And of the man denied a F.O.I.A. that his boss did not invite for coffee?

Well, there are some more things the man said that had me worried enough to pen this piece that a simple enough coffee and walk around the block may or may not mitigate…..professionally speaking, is he the man for his job?

No. Not until he learns to pick up the phone and say “Hello, how are you and who are you….”


23 Aug

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TheDonald is best compared to the fire engine or cop car racing on a street sirens blaring so that people pull over to the shoulder to get out of the fire enginge’s way. The smart people are those that immediately jump back on to the road threading traffic in the draft of the Emergency Services car, full speed ahead.

The question foremost to my mind is who the hell is running Trump’s campaign, a political manifestation of the fire engine parting waves of traffic to make way? Why isn’t that person(s) threading the political needle leaving no room for question or, proverbial holes, that could tear Trump’s campaign apart?

Failure to dot ‘i’s and cross ‘t’s flies in the face of P.R. and logic, as does failure of Trump’s team to build out on his trademark “You’re ……”.

Fill in that blank, I won’t used TheDonald’s trademarked Catch Phrase fearing litigation by TheDonald, a little too aggressive with suits. I will create my own suggesting TheDonald use two golden words will tear a raceway to the presidency the day TheDonald declares, two words that unemployed, financially hurting American are desperate to hear, a promise to learn the pathway being able to provide ,  “You’re Hired” accompanied with ‘Vote For Me If You Want To Hear those words.”

With a reputation for brilliance in marketing, Trump strategists are leaving me wanting for more. These are desperate times getting more desperate.

Failure to clarify his family vestment in Immigration, grandfather Drumpf, Ivana and Melania as talking points to rebalance the miscredit to his name of illegal v legal immigrants, was One.

Failure to answer detractors that business comes with failure and success but track record of more wins than losses that is the goal to aspire to, is Two.

Failure to state his foreign business expertise and foreign government relationships evolved over his decades of licensing his named, brand to buildings and such around the world is Three.

No, I am not holding my breath for Nene Leakes to start stumping for the Donald or any other of the reality checks of the RHO(__) franchise. Quite frankly I admire the man for keeping them out of this circus. Although it would be nice for Marla, Melania and Ivana doing pop ups for their man. Let’s be real, if anyone can speak to women about rights,wrongs and paychecks, it is these three.

I expect TheDonald to step up his game. I do want to know the Donald’s intention for his brood- part of his cabinet? Ambassadorial appointments, give us a hint.

I do want Thedonald to dish on what is discussed at Davos.

I want TheDonald to state emphatically he has no back room business deals with Bill.

In the least, I expect TheDonald wag his finger at his current political team that Sarah Palin ran rogue and in his trademark way, as only TheDonald can, I expect declare, to me, “You’e Hired” then send me on my way to Ireland.

Bring on all the comments TheDonald may make, but nothing beats providing the demanded details that the devil is in. As for working for TheDonald? In a heartbeat. A talented gal can dream cant she…


23 Aug

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There are two ways to enter America illegally and off the I.C.E. radar, by racing across the border or by coming in living invisibly on cash.

A fellow passenger reminded me. I took a bus ride. From New York to D.C. You do that sometimes when spontaneous decisions and serendipity rule. I took Bolt.

The young lady next to me attended GWU. We talked. You do that when you sit and slide for hours in seats next to each other. Once laughter settled, we talked. And my eyes widened as I learned the “more to the story” on immigration dominating the presidential 2016 race run.

She is Korean. She entered the country at age 12. Her parents were in Korea. They sent her to America with her aunt and uncle. She is Korea passported not America passported. She cannot be. She does not exist, technically, except at GW when her tuition check cashes. GWU is a private school. Last tuition fee I recall was about $54,000, maybe up since then. I heard that number in and around 2009 at GWU Patriots weekend as part of a headline comedian’s shtick, show, routine.

She explained as long as her tuition is paid in full she doesn’t need to identify or register or anything, successfully, I would say since she is in college, entering America at age 12.

Oh yes, she has a Social Security number so she can work.

This isn’t the first time I heard, or wrote, about foreign students entering America and securing Social Security numbers. I was at the M Street Social Security office a few years back with a peer. He was curious about the young people there in the Social Security office. As a journo, I don’t wonder, I ask.

I asked.

The students were American University students, another private institution. The students were at the Social Security office to get their cards so they could work. They were not Americans. They were Asian, interns at CAP, a democracy non-profit.

So let us be clear, for all the public expression of shock at infants, toddlers and tweens risking death and rape to come to America for a better life, here is the rest of the story. The poor storm the borders, the rich buy their way in. Let us repeat, the rich buy their illegal presence in living off the Immigration Visa overstay and other Border security penetrations.

Ask this question, what good is the tallest wall that can be built between America and Mexico, when planes filled with people with cash can just fly right over them….


10 Aug

The role of a leader is to defend, redeem, preach and govern.

A leader cannot point the way. A teacher just can’t teach. A leader must have intuition, empathy and know how to delegate, giving guidance in a way the recipient will absorb and digest. A leader must observe, be merciful knowing when a lamb is thirsty needing to drink.

The role of a leader is to nurture. When a person leaves their faith they are as if the lamb that ran from Moses to water to drink. A person leaving their faith thirsts for meaning in life.

The true leader will walk with his protege, re-fill their depleted faith, be their defender, the ultimate sacrifice.

Moses learned a lesson in leadership. Moses faith was depleted.  Moses lacked the esteem to believe the people would hear his message.

God revealed himself. God refilled Moses depleted faith. Moses didn’t feel worthy. Moses said , “Who am I?” God said to His protege, “I will be with you.”

Moses said, “no.” Moses knew he wasn’t going to be the person to lead the Israelite in to the Promised Land.  Moses knew he wasn’t worthy. So, Moses said the people needed to be spoken to and that he, Moses, had a speech impediment.

Moses begged God to send someone else to get the job done.
Moses knew the Israelites would be exiled again. Moses knew the temple destroyed.  Moses knew the future of Israel.

So, God gave Moses a test, the burning bush. Seven days, seven nights, Moses resisted that test that teaches us that while leaders can be born, Leaders can be made, that a true leader takes a lifetime of tutoring, the Leadership lesson from Moses .